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    Episode 16: Cage homes and subdivided apartments, is this the reality of HK? // Ask Martin: Why does God elect some not to believe?

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    Local Man Discovers Gift of Singleness, Calls Off Marriage*

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    In The Whisper, pt2

    How Do I Get Inspired?

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    Loss

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    Baptism Numbers Skyrocket After Installation of Waterslide in Local Church*

    What God Says About Me

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    Reppin’ Jesus on Social Media – How to Stay True in a World of Haters

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  • HOME
  • ABOUT
  • STUDY
  • FAITH
    • All
    • Bible
    • Discipleship
    • Prayer
    • Sin
    • Spiritual Practice
    • Theology

    Don’t Let Fear Take the Steering Wheel

    The Case for Shared Leadership (Part 5)

    The Case for Shared Leadership (Part 4)

    The Case for Shared Leadership (Part 3)

    The Case for Shared Leadership (Part 2)

    The Case for Shared Leadership (Part 1)

    More of Him, Less of Me

    You’ve Got a Friend

    3 Important Things You Should Know About Discipleship

    Discipleship Lessons from Star Wars

    Home

    Episode 26: Election, Free Will, and Flowers

    God Is Calling YOU to Rest (Part 2)

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Should we still listen to Hillsong?

    Easter Origin: Bunnies & Eggs?

    Before Christ Rose

    Our Misconception of the Body

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Can Christians go to multiple churches?

    The Relationship Between Frugalism and Stewardship

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Rejoice (Part 3)

  • LIVING
    • All
    • Identity
    • Mental Health
    • Purpose
    • Work

    Home Is Where Your Heart Is

    Interview: Transformation from Pole Dancing

    The Power of Names

    In a Difficult Season in My Life, I Joined the Production Team

    Wisdom from a Baby

    LET THERE BE LOVE — on Christian Veganism (Part 5)

    There’s Nothing Wrong With You

    LET THERE BE LOVE — on Christian Veganism (Part 4)

    LET THERE BE LOVE — on Christian Veganism (Part 3)

    LET THERE BE LOVE — on Christian Veganism (Part 2)

    The Addiction You Didn’t Know You Had (Part 2)

    The Addiction You Didn’t Know You Had (Part 1)

    LET THERE BE LOVE — on Christian Veganism (Part 1)

    Home

    Episode 25: What’s up with the education system?

    Our Misconception of the Body

    The Relationship Between Frugalism and Stewardship

    Home

    Episode 23: Why I changed my career

    What Consumes Us (Part 2)

    What Consumes Us (Part 1)

    Jesus and Minimalism

  • RELATIONSHIPS
    • All
    • Church
    • Dating
    • Family
    • Marriage
    • Singleness

    Home Is Where Your Heart Is

    In a Difficult Season in My Life, I Joined the Production Team

    Wisdom from a Baby

    Dating for Jesus**

    A Short Letter to the Tired Single

    3 Important Things You Should Know About Discipleship

    Home

    Episode 27: How do you find the right person? Questions on singleness, boundaries and friend zones

    The Addiction You Didn’t Know You Had (Part 2)

    The Addiction You Didn’t Know You Had (Part 1)

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Can a Christian date a non-Christian, then convert him/her?

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Should we still listen to Hillsong?

    Home

    Episode 25: What’s up with the education system?

    Get Used to Different (Part 2)

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Is cohabitation a sin?

    Before Saying “I Will”

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Need for Companionship

    Local Man Discovers Gift of Singleness, Calls Off Marriage*

    Get Used to Different (Part 1)

    Talking with Family Members About Mental Health (Part 3)

  • CULTURE
    • All
    • Evangelism
    • Justice
    • Social issues
    Our Christmas Collection

    Our Christmas Collection

    You’ve Got a Friend

    Discipleship Lessons from Star Wars

    Ethical Consumerism

    Easter Origin: Bunnies & Eggs?

    Get Used to Different (Part 2)

    Home

    Episode 24: All about Crypto, NFTs, and the Church

    What Consumes Us (Part 2)

    Is metaverse or VR church a real church?

    Should Christians go to war?

    Home

    Episode 22: Enneagram Part Two

    What Consumes Us (Part 1)

    Jesus and Minimalism

    Home

    Episode 21: Enneagram Part One

    Get Used to Different (Part 1)

    Christian Cancel Culture: A Gospel for the Oppressors

    Christian Cancel Culture: A Gospel for the Oppressors

    Your Calling to Bring Shalom into a Deprived World

    Your Calling to Bring Shalom into a Deprived World

    Welcome to Shift Gear

    READY? SET… GO!

    READY? SET… GO!

    Home

    Episode 16: Cage homes and subdivided apartments, is this the reality of HK? // Ask Martin: Why does God elect some not to believe?

    Home

    Episode 14: How should we engage on social media? // Ask Martin: Would God’ve been more loving if He didn’t create anyone?

  • CREATIVE
    • All
    • Fiction
    • Inspiration
    • Poem
    • Satire

    12-STEP GRACE

    Interview: Transformation from Pole Dancing

    Our Christmas Collection

    Our Christmas Collection

    Dating for Jesus**

    Local Man Discovers Gift of Singleness, Calls Off Marriage*

    Why

    In The Whisper, pt2

    How Do I Get Inspired?

    Rejoice (Part 3)

    Rejoice (Part 2)

    Rejoice (Part 1)

    Loss

    Celebrating Creativity

    Baptism Numbers Skyrocket After Installation of Waterslide in Local Church*

    What God Says About Me

    In The Whisper

    Reppin’ Jesus on Social Media – How to Stay True in a World of Haters

  • PODCAST
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Ashamed of the Light

Emily Kusunoki by Emily Kusunoki
2021/05/04
in Identity, Mental Health
0

It feels like being locked inside a dark room. You’re alone, there are no windows, and you’re not smart enough to find your own way out. Besides, do you even want to? You have no idea what’s outside. It could be even worse than this shadowy, quiet place. At least in here, you’re safe. At least in here, you’re in control. Right?

We have all entered that dark and isolated room called Shame. The first time we enter is typically around our second year of life. Shame conditions us, it tells us when we’re doing something right and when we’re just wrong. It tells us when we’re good and when we’re bad. When we are acceptable or just plain rejected. When we are loved and when we are unlovable.

When we are locked in by shame, we act as though shame has the power to decide our worth. Actually, this is the most dangerous part of shame. From our very first experience of it, it cuts through our actions to the vulnerable core of our identity. We identify with it. Like the enemy whispering into the ear of Eve as she doubted God’s integrity, we often allow shame to define our reality.

But the truth is, shame is incredibly weak. It distorts our reality because in the light, it is fragile and insecure. When exposed to the truth it cannot survive. We feel like we need our self-criticism and self-condemnation to become stronger, but the truth is we just need to separate our feelings of rejection from our individual worth. To notice that our actions can be deemed right or wrong but our identities cannot, is life changing. To see that we are accepted and loved regardless of what we do is true freedom. 

Shame continues in secret. To heal it, we need to expose the things we are ashamed about to safe people, who listen and hear what we’ve done, but don’t reject us or tell us that we’re bad because of them. We can be good people who do bad things, but when we respond with denial or blame, we prevent the repairing process from taking place. Shame and guilt help us recognize when something is bad, but if we can’t separate it from “who we are” then we eventually retreat back into that dark, lonely room. 

In reality, we belong outside of that room. We belong in vulnerable relationships in which we can repair the inevitable bad things that are part of living in a fallen world. God made us vulnerable not to give us pain, but to give us an even deeper capacity for relationship.

Emily Kusunoki

Emily Kusunoki

Emily found lots of comforts in the pages of various books while growing up. Within her passion for reading and writing, she likes to combine her professional knowledge of mental health with her faith and love of Jesus. // Favorite book: A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini

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